How Men View Women in the Media

I recently read an entertaining article written by Alison Rosen on the Marie Claire website.  You can read the article here.  Reading this article I thought of several observations I have made, or my wife has pointed out to me.  Let me see if I can articulate them sufficiently here.

A few years ago, perhaps more than I really care to consider, a beautiful lady in the media married a common looking but talented man.  The lady was Julia Roberts, and the man was Lyle Lovett.  Personally I was shocked at this.  I know I shouldn’t be as it is everyone’s right to find the person they want to be with and people shouldn’t judge, but I think we all do.  I was discussing this “beauty” disparity and my wife asked me a simple question.  One I had never really thought of before, or at least not deeply.

She asked “Why do you care?”  I thought about it for a few nanoseconds and answered.  I told her that I guess that I wanted to understand how Julia would do such a thing, then I thought wait a minute.  If Julia Roberts could fall for a man like Lyle Lovett all men had a chance with Julia!  We both laughed, but looking at myself and how beautiful my wife is I already knew first hand that woman are more complex (Thank God!) than men.

Alison Rosen mentions in her article that people tell her to wear a skirt, or that she dresses like a whore, wear more makeup, wear less makeup.  I guess this is one of the dangers of being in the public eye.  I think what Alison Rosen is experiencing here is exactly what I was doing subconsciously with Julia Roberts.  I had it in my mind, thanks to her movies putting me there, that she was someone I knew.  Now logically I know this isn’t true, she’s an actress in a make believe world, but movies must get you to buy into the plot.  To put yourself into the story.  For example I did not enjoy, and didn’t watch the entire movie of Julia Roberts film “A Scanky Hooker Finds Love” wait, that’s my title, “Pretty Woman” is the title you know it by.

I had a hard time buying into that plot line.  Why?  I can’t see myself with some skanky hooker.  How in God’s green Earth could anyone?  There in lies my point.  Some people like the idea of being with “whorish” woman others don’t.  Some are in between, or changes with their mood.  If you are celebrity with a public e-mail address, or worse a Twitter/Facebook account you can get slapped in the face near instantly with the two extremes.  I love you! or I hate you!  Many people, including myself, think it is our right to speak our mind to a celebrity simply because we can.  Some people are down right rude to celebrities.  In fact I believe some people are rude just so they can get a rise out of a celebrity.  If you follow celebrites on Twitter you see very quickly they are people with feelings too.  The media has already shown us that it is fine to say what ever you want about a celebrity (true or untrue) and the relative anonymity of the Internet allows people that can barely look at someone in the face to drone on about lack writing skills, intelligence, or even personal hygiene!

So as we all know sex sells in the media.  It sells for women, it sells for men.  Men are more visually stimulated than women so shapely figures, skirts, long hair, bright colors are usually universally accepted by men.  What gets a little more complex is how men like or dislike women in the media based on their perceived personalities.  I believe for most celebrities their media personality is skewed at best, and out right masks covering who they really are.

So the same dynamic that we saw and learned first hand in Junior High, at least for me, is still in play today.  Very few people are who they seem to be, they are the people that their peers have taught them to be.  In my younger, friendless days, I identified this constant popularity contest and rebelled against it.  People can accept me for who I am and if they didn’t want to, the hell with them!  That’s all fine and good until people that love and care about you know a wonderful exciting intelligent person but the rest of the world see’s an a$$hole.  Then the world can’t understand why that lovely wonderful and socially accepted woman could be with you.  Or how those wonderful children could have turned out so well exposed to you.

So it comes full circle.  What we expect of the people that entertain us in the media, society expects from us.  Thank God we “non-media types” just have to please a few people and not thousands, hundred of thousands, or even millions!  So the next time you look at a woman, or a man, in the media and you wonder how they could dress, or act in a certain way, give them a break and keep it to yourself.  Or maybe you can do what I do (most of the time) and just share it with your spouse and have a good laugh.